Jess - everyone has an opinion when you're planning to be a parent and even more so after you become one. The thing to remember is that these people care about you so most of what they say / do is with the best intention even if it sometimes hurts. Explain that it feels right to you and that it means a lot for them to support your decision. And Katya's right, the best thing they can do is help you; I would say the first 6 weeks are the hardest so get them to cook and clean for you etc. Good luck xxx
Jess - get it girl! How amazing to do one of the most selfless things all by yourself, because it's truly what you want. As someone who also grew up with just one parent, yeah it may be difficult at times but it sure beats having a parent that's not fully in it. The whole 'whole ass vs half ass' thing, ya know. My mom kicked serious ass to make sure that I had all I needed and I never felt like I was lacking because I didn't have that dad around, and it taught me to have serious hustle. Your future kid is very lucky to have you as a mum and will know their entire lives that they are ~ wanted and valued ~
Jess, this is so fortuitous. I had seriously contemplated becoming a SPBC several years ago and am now revisiting the idea--and I was just thinking about it in the shower minutes before opening this. Thanks for writing this letter and normalizing it just a bit more. Best of luck to you!
Lez Bien: A clue how you can turn over your friend catalog for something fresher and more real: I know nobody can tell you the right way to present yourself that will make you comfortable and feel safe, but the key might ironically be in Coming Out a little louder. Switch on the part of your persona that doesn't hesitate to call out bigotry, and dial down the part of you that is hiding. The Real You, all the opinions, passions and quirks, is what that will attract good, solid new friends into your life. You want a new set of friends who admire you, want to be around you, and love you for the right reasons. Say what you think before you have time to triangulate whether you'll be judged. It happens anyway, nobody gets out alive, so be who you are, louder and with more conviction. That is attractive to kindred spirits.
To the French girl : Dit leur d'aller se faire voir. Si tu es en médecine, tu es entourée de gens qui doivent eux aussi bosser 8h par jour. C'est là que tu dois chercher tes nouveaux potes : y'a toujours quelqu'un pour aller à la BU, quelqu'un qui a rien compris au cours non plus ou quelqu'un qui boirait bien un cafe "parce que là y'en a ras le bol".
En plus tu es probablement dans une grande ville pour tes études, donc profites-en pour rencontrer des gens.
Sinon tu peux aussi prendre un chat et rester enfermée chez toi mais ça plaît pas à tout le monde
Jess - I'm considering the same option for myself in the next few years! To anyone who judges single motherhood: most mothers—partnered or not—would attest that everyone is basically a single mother at the end of the day, as even the best of men don't tend to participate much in the emotional & physical labor of parenting. Many people become parents by accident, often resentfully. But you know what you want. So much so that you're willing to go out of your way to consciously choose this path, challenges and all. And your future child will be SO lucky to be raised by an independent, self-assured mother, and always know how wanted they were. Wishing you the best of luck!
Jess - everyone has an opinion when you're planning to be a parent and even more so after you become one. The thing to remember is that these people care about you so most of what they say / do is with the best intention even if it sometimes hurts. Explain that it feels right to you and that it means a lot for them to support your decision. And Katya's right, the best thing they can do is help you; I would say the first 6 weeks are the hardest so get them to cook and clean for you etc. Good luck xxx
Jess - get it girl! How amazing to do one of the most selfless things all by yourself, because it's truly what you want. As someone who also grew up with just one parent, yeah it may be difficult at times but it sure beats having a parent that's not fully in it. The whole 'whole ass vs half ass' thing, ya know. My mom kicked serious ass to make sure that I had all I needed and I never felt like I was lacking because I didn't have that dad around, and it taught me to have serious hustle. Your future kid is very lucky to have you as a mum and will know their entire lives that they are ~ wanted and valued ~
Jess, this is so fortuitous. I had seriously contemplated becoming a SPBC several years ago and am now revisiting the idea--and I was just thinking about it in the shower minutes before opening this. Thanks for writing this letter and normalizing it just a bit more. Best of luck to you!
Lez Bien: A clue how you can turn over your friend catalog for something fresher and more real: I know nobody can tell you the right way to present yourself that will make you comfortable and feel safe, but the key might ironically be in Coming Out a little louder. Switch on the part of your persona that doesn't hesitate to call out bigotry, and dial down the part of you that is hiding. The Real You, all the opinions, passions and quirks, is what that will attract good, solid new friends into your life. You want a new set of friends who admire you, want to be around you, and love you for the right reasons. Say what you think before you have time to triangulate whether you'll be judged. It happens anyway, nobody gets out alive, so be who you are, louder and with more conviction. That is attractive to kindred spirits.
i felt that question 2 so hard i felt like my brain sent it in without me knowing
To the French girl : Dit leur d'aller se faire voir. Si tu es en médecine, tu es entourée de gens qui doivent eux aussi bosser 8h par jour. C'est là que tu dois chercher tes nouveaux potes : y'a toujours quelqu'un pour aller à la BU, quelqu'un qui a rien compris au cours non plus ou quelqu'un qui boirait bien un cafe "parce que là y'en a ras le bol".
En plus tu es probablement dans une grande ville pour tes études, donc profites-en pour rencontrer des gens.
Sinon tu peux aussi prendre un chat et rester enfermée chez toi mais ça plaît pas à tout le monde
Jess - I'm considering the same option for myself in the next few years! To anyone who judges single motherhood: most mothers—partnered or not—would attest that everyone is basically a single mother at the end of the day, as even the best of men don't tend to participate much in the emotional & physical labor of parenting. Many people become parents by accident, often resentfully. But you know what you want. So much so that you're willing to go out of your way to consciously choose this path, challenges and all. And your future child will be SO lucky to be raised by an independent, self-assured mother, and always know how wanted they were. Wishing you the best of luck!
Work Work-out Shower Nookie Food Movie Sleep (Repeat)