Welcome to Gooped

Our first post!

We are two women with extremely narrow scopes of self expression. TV shows, YouTube series, podcasts, books, albums… all meaningless. Chasms of nonsense, void of any insight or illumination. Finally we have decided to step into the light... acrylic toenails first.

The internet is a Charming Charlies of misinformation– a sparkling assault of artificiality that is sadly organized by color. The distress call has exhausted itself to a dull death rattle and it’s going to take two iconic female women to finally make the lifestyle space what it was always meant to be.

That’s why we created GOOPED. This is a place for us to put our musings, feelings, ramblings, obsessions, etc. that don’t quite fit in anywhere else. We know that there are at least 5 LGBTQ+ teenagers with unnatural hair colors who will live for this content.

For the first time ever, Katya will be offering her unique and inspiring perspective on living and life in the form of two or more continuous sentences, in an unprecedented cascade of logical coherence hitherto unknown by her fans or even her friends and family. Paying subscribers will have unfettered access to whole paragraphs of deliciously delectable prose designed to make sense, so that she can earn cents, that become dollars which fuel her passion to write more for you to pay to read. Such rich literary treasures these days are rare, so don’t miss out on this unique intellectual opportunity, as she is likely to perish at any moment. 

For those with an aversion to the written word or an embarrassing lack of literacy, there will also be exclusive video clips, some of which will contain highly explicit content of a lewd and lascivious nature, featuring titillating acts of grotesque sexuality.

Trixie also said “Fine, I’ll do it.”

Every week, we will connect with all of you through our advice column Long Time Caller, First Time Listener and our regular roundup of the content we’ve been enjoying that week, Unpaid Spokeswomen. Plus, paid subscribers will receive a bonus post from us each week. These posts will range from makeup shopping tips, to extremely in-depth guides to foot care, or whatever else has been on our minds. You can get unlimited access to these posts for only $5/month– don’t miss out! And for an extra dose of GOOPED, you can subscribe as a Founding Member and get an extra special top secret virtual gift from each of us.

GOOPED is the place to be for an unprecedented look into our lives. Moving forward, this will be a fun place to chat about being on tour and all of the other surprises the future has in store for us. All unfiltered, and just for you guys. So, subscribe now!

Love,

Trixie and Katya