Unpaid Spokeswomen #24
Welcome to Unpaid Spokeswomen, a column where we log what we’ve been into this week. Behind the wigs, makeup, costumes, and several layers of irony, we are two humans who genuinely enjoy doing things. Here is a weekly roundup of our unfiltered expert recommendations.
Trixie:
Too Faced Born This Way Powder Foundation
OK spoiler alert I have a YouTube video coming up where I tested the most expensive makeup products I could find. Among the assorted niceties were trinkets manufactured by Givenchy, Gucci, Tom Ford, and pretty much anything else that sounds fancy and it’s hard to spell. Here’s a bigger spoiler alert as many of these products were absolute flops and barely earned a drugstore price point let alone a luxury retail tag..
However, one of the products I fell in love with was the Born This Way powder foundation from Too Faced. Super full coverage, almost creamy to the touch, and available in a dizzying number of shades, this is one of the first powder foundations I’ve actually liked. Having famously dry skin with a lot of texture, I find it difficult to wear matte powder foundations in general. This is a medium buildable coverage with a natural matte finish that looked very real even as I built up the coverage. It’s a rather ballsy price point, but I am really impressed and totally obsessed. In drag, I love using it to brush over my contoured and highlighted face for extra coverage. I even use some deeper shade of it as contour. Out of drag I love throwing on some sunscreen and a quick pass of this with a fluffy brush for some gentle unclockable perfection. It really lays well over other types of products and I could see this being a perfect way to touch up your face at the end of the workday before you go to dinner. AND JUST LIKE THAT. Complexion Perfection.
Not Watching Napoleon Dynamite
You know, readers, I recently took a trip down memory lane and rewatched the iconic Napoleon Dynamite film. The film came out when I was in high school so I was the exact age MTV films was targeting with their quirky and comedic marketing. I was a little drunk and looking for something familiar to watch as I ate a Domino’s Pizza that I impulse purchased at 11pm.
My memories of Napoleon Dynamite are entirely positive and I went into the experience ready to rekindle a friendship. Unfortunately, the film did not hold up. My teenage brain thought this film was hilarious and universal and one of a kind. My 32-year-old brain found it to be slow and bizarre. It remains unique in its pacing and vibe, but the experience I had with the film as a teenager was a much more compelling one. I recommend that you remember her as she was and resist the urge to stroll down memory lane.
Katya:
Ozark
I sat down to watch Ozark, Netflix’s bleak money-laundering drama set in the “red-neck riviera” that follows Marty and Wendy Byrde as they navigate the tricky terrain of laundering money for a Mexican drug cartel, working with the FBI, and raising their teenage son Jonah and daughter Charlotte. I got immediately sucked into the series after watching Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul a few years ago, and I gobbled up the seven episodes of its latest season. I won’t give any spoilers, but you can rest assured that these most recent episodes give you plenty of my two personal favorite characters: White trash farm lady grandma Darlene Snell, and shit-talking screamy Ruth Langmore. And don’t you worry, every fucking frame of this damn series is awash in its depressing singature blue.
Euphoria season 2
I watch so much fucking TV, sometimes I can’t even tell if I like what I’m watching. All I have for a shittiness barometer is HBOMax’s godforsaken And Just Like That, which remains absolutely bottom of the barrel. I tortured myself through yet another shit-ass episode of that hokey pokey series, and I have no idea why I didn’t turn it off. As I choked back the last few blistering images of that shit show, I sought out a palate cleanser and there couldn’t have been a better one besides the latest from season 2 of Euphoria. In stark contrast to the universe of Sex and the City which follows a bunch of uptight oldies grappling with whatever new indignities the writers have chosen to punish them with, it’s a welcome treat to watch a bunch of gorgeous people in their twenties play high schoolers who do little else than get high, have sex and beat the shit out of each other. Oddly enough, both shows featured lots of dicks and balls, even if one of them was a very fake dummy dick. This is a great season for lovers of Sydney Sweeney, as she is just so completely dazzling, incredibly talented and criminally gorgeous as Cassie.
katya a sydney sweeney stan?? i know thats right
I can not wait for that expensive make up video because I am genuinely curious about Trixie's opinions on Tom Ford's beauty products. I don't mind splurging money on make up as long as they work, like Pat McGrath eyeshadow palettes are worth the price, but I think Tom Ford products are overrated. The same goes for Charlotte Tilbury, too. Gucci's formula is nothing special, but at least the packaging is gorgeous.
Just Like That is a joke, I couldn't even finish the first episode, it was just too much of a mess. Sometimes I sit through some shows because I simply can not look away, you know that car crash analogy; it's bad, but you can not look away. That's also how I feel about Euphoria. The first season was alright actually, and I really enjoyed those two bridge episodes between s1 and s2, too. However, this season is such a mess. Nothing makes sense, and it feels like Sam Levinson abandoned the half of the storylines he'd introduced in the season one.
Also, yes, Katya is right about the part 'a bunch of gorgeous people in their twenties play high schoolers who do little else than get high, have sex and beat the shit out of each other.' Although, I disagree with Sydney's talent part. I think her performance is over the top, comedic almost. I have seen her in other projects, she's a decent actress normally, but she's quite bad in Euphoria. Maybe it's the writing.